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Ejiji-Vintage

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Hello, Helloo!

Its me again, with a new blog post up for you guys to read.


So we are still on this matter of purity! (We will call this post the part 2 and hopefully the concluding part to this topic lol)


Before I start, I have a quick question to throw at you guys:


"Does the pursuit of purity stop once in marriage?"





Let me know what you guys think.. I would really love to understand the different perceptions there could possibly be to this question.

There is a video that has pretty much gone viral on the internet.


You can watch the video HERE!


For those that may not be able to watch the video, I will quickly summarise what the video entails.


The clip is from Steve Harvey's show titled "nothing wrong with a man that is in love with his wife". (Steve Harvey is a popular american producer.)


Yerp, back to my summary..


"So one of his guests asked a question on whether it was a sin for her husband to be 'touching her up' (a better could be groping) right before she leads worship in church. She is a worship leader and her husband is a keyboardist and also preacher. Their marriage at the time of the video has been on going for 5 years and 4 days. The lady also mentioned that she finds it distracting when her husband is this affectionate towards her - especially when it is just before her ministrations. Whilst she ministers, he constantly winks at her and even in their personal prayer time at home, he grabs her butt!!"

So that is my summary..

(feel free to take some time to let all that sink in loool)

I hope you guys now understand why I asked my question on - "Does the pursuit of purity stop once in marriage?"


I have read some of the comments in regards to what people think of her question and majority of people do not see anything wrong with what her husband is doing. He is simply just showing her love and people have advised her to literally 'get over it'.


I on the other hand, do not agree with it.


I believe that there is definitely a time and place for everything.


I mean for one, the purpose of the church is definitely not for indecent activities. 


Both the woman and her husband are in roles of leadership in the church and one thing I  always say is that - whether you are a leader or not, you need to be aware of the fact that you are being watched (maybe watched is a creepy word so I will stick to observed)


There is a certain way we are to carry ourselves and live out our lives especially as believers and this is highly due to the fact that we are being observed. We need to be aware that people do not necessarily need to announce that they are watching you before you come to the acceptance of this.


The bible says in Mark 9:42:
"Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea."

By little children, the bible refers to young Christians and to think that such an indecent act could lead a young person/believer astray is actually frightening. People could observe the man's way of 'showing his wife love' and that could literally become their own definition of moral standards in the church..


Even if we were to disregard the leadership role/position that both the wife and husband are in, I would still have the same views.


The bible says "you shall not make for yourself an idol, or any likeness of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth." (Exodus 20:4)


We can never really know the full story of what is going on in that marriage but to me personally, it comes across like a case of idolatry.

God is clear that he is a jealous God and he does not want anything or anyone to steal our affection to a point where it overrides the affection we have towards him.


The husband in this clip is clearly struggling with Idolatry. He can not seem to do anything without groping his wife.. 


I don't quite get how he can be playing his keyboard to worship God and still have the time to be winking at his wife?


Some would argue he is great at multi tasking but the way I see it, when it comes to worship - especially to God, all other tasks must be dropped! 

I honestly don't believe that he is able to worship God in that setting. Perhaps he is but he is definitely not doing it to the fullness of his ability and capability.

"Praying alongside groping". I have never heard the two ever be used in a sentence before. (I found her comment on this particularly scary).


He is lifting his wife above God in my opinion!


The marriage has been ongoing for 5 years and I pray they do enjoy many more great years together.


However, I cannot help but think that this indecent behavior from the husband, did not start in marriage but rather in the dating stage.


"what you allow before marriage will or can only escalate in marriage!"


I personally find her husband rude and this is because the wife clearly expressed how uncomfortable she was. Love is supposed to be a self-less act; where you put aside your own desires to ensure other peoples desires are met.


In this case, the husband clearly disregarded the views of his wife.


RANT OVER!!


Please do not see this as me being judgmental but rather see it as me expressing my views on the matter.




Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
(Princess)

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Hey guys.

So I am back again and this time I want us to to talk about purity.This post is going to be very faith-based and so you can either choose to read along or call it a day. (the choice is yours)

I'd love for you to stay though!!!

More recently, God has been exposing the real me to me. He has been opening my eyes to see things about myself that has somewhat shocked and made me uncomfortable.

And the issue of purity has been one of major things that he has been speaking to me about.



I understand that purity is such a big topic but the kind of purity I am talking about here is the one set in the context of  a romantic relationship.

My heart desire will always be to make my father - God - happy. I want my life to be pleasing to him. Hence why this path of purity is such an important thing to me.

(Although, I have come to realize that, it is one thing to have the desire to want to please someone and it is another thing to actually know what the persons definition of 'pleasing' is..)

To ensure I stay on this path on purity, I have boundaries. Growing up, I have always thought that my boundaries were abit 'too much'/ unrealistic and that was because my convictions made me stand out. They literally set me apart from the crowd and initially I was not okay with that.

The thought of me being the 'odd one out' scared me and so I fought against my convictions for a very long time! Until it hit me!

From the day I gave my life to Jesus Christ, the calling on my life changed.  The new calling required me to be set apart. (1 Peter 2:9)

I mean, what good is the good news if it is the same as everything else. In order for it to really stand out, there must be something uniquely different about it.
Now I am not saying that the calling for believers to be 'set apart' is the only thing that makes Christianity different to other religions but I do believe that it is one of the major/key things that compliments the uniqueness of my faith.

Anyhow. let me get back to my post..
So once I understood the new calling on my life, I have now come to accept it. I am no longer pressured to fit in and I have become proud to say the least of my convictions.

I no longer run from sharing them but there is now a new boldness that has driven out the fear that once crippled me in the past.

 I was talking about 'exposure' earlier on.. I have come to realize that my convictions; my definitions of what I considered to be godly moral standards were all based on my emotions.

I once heard this amazing quote by this amazing teacher called Ify Alexis 'a vague definition of righteousness will lead to compromise'.

This quote pretty much sums up this blog post.

I thought my convictions were based on Gods definition of what was right and unacceptable but actually they weren't.

I defined my own convictions unconsciously.

Why do I say that?
That quote clearly states that if your definition of righteousness was vague, when it comes to taking a stand for what you believe, then compromise was inevitable.

This was basically the position I found myself in.

I had a definition of purity but I defined it myself.

I had forgotten that my life was now surrendered and submitted to a greater being.

I failed to go back to him - his word - when it came to the definition of what purity actually was.

I decided 'ah yes, this is definitely wrong, I JUST KNOW.. I CAN TELL that it would not make God happy.'

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying, everything will be spelled out for you. Especially when it comes to Gods word as you won't find 'thou shall not kiss or hold hands' in the bible but then again, God has given us wisdom!

The truth is in there and if you earnestly search for it, you will find it!

1Peter 1:25 became so clear to me. The bible says 'the word of God stands forever' not my emotions.
Every decision, conviction etc we make on this earth will always be tried and the plan is to see if we are able to stand!

It was clear that I definitely would not have been able to stand.

I am so glad that all these things were exposed to me before I was put into a situation where I would have compromised.

I mean, this testimony of mine is definitely one that others probably wished they had and in all humility, I am so grateful to God.

I am now in the process of letting God define what purity is.

I want my every conviction and boundary to be set on Gods terms and not my own.

I repeat..
It is one thing to have the desire to please someone but then again it is another thing to actually know what the persons definition of 'pleasing' is..

I will be ending this post here today but I most definitely assure you guys that a part 2 from this post will be shared soon.

I will leave you guys with a few scriptures that have ministered to me in terms of purity.


  1.  1 Corinthians 6:20 - You were bought with a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies.
  2.  Galatians 5:19 - The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery.
  3. 1 Thessalonians 4:3 - It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality.
  4. Hebrews 13:4 - Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
  5. 1 Timothy 4:12 - Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young. But set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.



Feel free to share your take on purity with me. (or perhaps scriptures that you are holding on to)

Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
(Princess)
x

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Hey guys.. 

So it has been way too long but I am back! - and back for good..

I will consider putting up a post to explain why the rather long and sudden break but for now, I am here to discuss something else.

Friendships.. Friends..

You get the gist..

Well, more recently I have come to realize that I do not really have friends.
I mean, I have never been one to have a lot of people around me but even in the small circle that I do have, I struggle to pin point who my actual friends are.

If I am being truthful, I feel as though, I have been lying to myself for the longest time and this was simply because I so badly wanted friends. 

I mean, everyone has their own 'SQUAD' group. I guess I just wanted the same for myself.

People who I could build up, love and support and they would also be able to do likewise for me. & of course the whole building beautiful memories together.  

Well, I have come to accept that perhaps that life is just not for me or rather perhaps, I am just a really complex person.

Sitting down to reflect on things - which I do a lot (a bit too much at times lol)

It is quite evident that I have a very unhealthy definition of what a friend is..
(maybe unclear is a better word)

I mean let us not get acquaintances and an actual friend as in your close/tight circle mixed up.

l will give you guys a few reasons why I have been running away from admitting my lack of friends:
1. Fear of being alone - it is not really 'the being alone' that is my issue but rather, having other people see that I am alone.
2. Fear of starting all over again - in terms of building new friendships. Its really a lot of work and to think I would have to invest in so much time to create some lasting memories is somewhat daunting.
3. Hurting people - that is just something that does not sit too well with me.

I constantly find myself in friendships where it is me constantly giving and I am getting nothing back in return.

I am literally the one pulling people up whether it be through advice or encouragement and it really can be so draining especially when it is all one-sided.

I mean what happened to 'iron sharpens iron'? 

*sigh*
This really is a lot but I am happy to share this on here.

Perhaps I will end up helping one or two people come to the same realization or even get some help myself from your comments.

Well..
Back to my story.

From a very young age, I have always had what one would call 'very sharp eyes' lol.
So I notice things very quickly - even when I am NOT looking out for them.

I won't say I notice but rather, things are exposed to me - especially when I have a false perception of what the truth is about a person or matter.

This has always been a big issue for me as it meant, I was exposed to things no child should ever really notice such a young vulnerable age.
It is just one of those things that once your mind has captured a specific thing, it is very hard not to think on it. That particular thing becomes soo magnified and can eventually end up controlling your entire life.

 This very trait of mine followed me into my friendships and so I would always see things that would expose the perception people had towards me and me being so very great at giving people the benefit of the doubt, I would always ignore it..

Well so much for ignoring things because there has now been such a build up that it is all soo hard to ignore.

This phrase now comes to mind - 'you are trying too hard to hold on to something that was never meant to be in your life'

Perhaps that is all abit too harsh.
Hmm!

I don't know but I will be truthful and say I AM HURTING.

I am hurting because I have invested soo much emotions into something that was never meant to be and have only just come to the realization now? It is just all abit too much.

I am a Christian and this matter of my friendships has always been one that I have always handed over to God..
I do believe I asked him to take the center-stage of all but I guess at times we could all still get things wrong.

I am now left in a place where I would say I am healing.

I have refused to pray about God sending new friends my way and that is just because I do not think it is something I can handle.(at the moment)

I don'tt want anything to remind me of the stress my past friendships brought and I also do not want to fill anyone's life with my baggage.. (cause trust me, I am no saint!)

However, more recently, I have been feeling like my 'I am not ready' is just an excuse. 

I feel as though it may be me running away from my fears?
The fear that I still will not be able to find the right friends and end up going through another horrible cycle again...

OR maybe that is not the case and I am just overthinking..

I will be stopping here for today but who knows, this post may have a PART 2, 3 and so on.

I do have a few questions for you all though: (I would really appreciate some transparency)

1. If you were in my shoes, what would you do?
2. Do you think I am hiding from my fears with my line of 'I am not ready' for any new friendships?
3. What is YOUR definition of a friendship?

I look forward to hearing from you.

Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
(Princess)
x


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Hi guys,

I hope you all are keeping well.

Today, I feel inspired to share one of my new year resolutions with you all.

As it is one that is very dear to me, I will be taking time out to really explain it.

SO HERE GOES!!



Evangelism is one thing that I want to do more frequently in the year 2017.

You will find that my personality is set up in a very unique way, in the sense that I am someone who is so eager to share things with others especially when it's something I personally find amazing. (so the list is ongoing from sweets to food).

Now I know some may find this weird, but I have the mentality that I have/need to share my new found love/interest with those around me. (I'm always secretly hoping that everyone will be able to see, perceive and taste things the way I can!)

Anyway, before I start drifting off topic....

The same thing applies to my faith!
 
I love to share my faith.

In terms of evangelism, I am aware that GOD is big and that one cannot know everything about him. However I am willing to share the little that I do know/have experienced!

Matthew 9:37 says 'the harvest is full but the labourers are few.'. God has called and chosen me to be his representative here on this planet earth! (speaking for myself here!)

I have to step up, and make myself available! He is eager to reach the harvest but he wants to do it through me (his representative).

Therefore, whether or not the harvest is brought in is down to me!

With this in mind, I know that I cannot afford to slack.

I am in no pressure about whether or not people are open to receive what I have to say.

All I intend to do is rely on the holy spirit and not on my emotions or own intelligence.

He will tell me what to say/share, where to go and so on...

Exodus 4:31 talks about the Israelites. They were being oppressed by the Egyptians so basically, you could say 'life had hit them hard'. However, God being so loving sent Moses to tell them he cared! Now this is what I call a SEASONAL WORD!


As Moses made himself available, God gave him a word for his children and as they heard, they bowed down and worshipped.

I believe that the harvest really is ripe but a lot of people are experiencing Exodus 4:31, in the sense that life has hit them hard!

They have a lot of unanswered questions and so God wants us all to be the ones to give them that seasonal word.

God is relying on us and I personally pray that I wont fail him.

I do understand that not everyone may understand this post, and I am more than happy to answer questions.

I would also love to read some of your new year resolutions and so, please do send them to me. (atleast one!!)

Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
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Did I hear somebody say 'Testimony Time'?

Well that is what I am going to be doing today.

Today's testimony involves my little sister -  Gracey Babey :)
 

Before I make a start on my Testimony, I will give you guys a bit of background information.

I accepted this lovely man named Jesus into my life at the age of 16 and since then things have drastically changed for me.

I believe everyone has a past and so, today I will be sharing a bit of mine.

Growing up - from living in Nigeria and moving to the UK - I hated my little sister.

There was this deep hatred and anger I felt towards her.

This is something that I often struggle explaining but I know the feeling was very present in my life.

In the past, I have shared this story/testimony with a few friends and people always seem so shocked!

(This because if you know me and my sister, you will know how inseparable we are!)

Before my encounter with God, I would always hear voices (thinking back at it now, I must have felt like some superhero with powers lol)
I would always hear voices that would instruct (perhaps the right word is 'encourage' lol) me as to what to say or how to react towards my sister.. and lets just say, it was always negative things that I would hear.

At that time in my life, I never really questioned anything as it was 'my norm'...

Fast Forward to Present Date (28th February 2017)

Now today, everything has changed.

I love my sister and  no one and nothing can change that.
 

Ofcourse, we still have our moments like other sisters around the world lol but I can truly say I have nothing but love for her.

 I encourage you all to spend today, the last day in the month of February to share testimonies.

At times, we can easily forget how much we have progressed in life but then the good thing about Testimonies is that they enable you to reflect and see how much change has occurred in your life.

That being said, I look forward to reading all your lovely testimonies (no matter how small, please share them with me!)

Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
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Hey guys,

So some of you that follow me on my different social media sites will know that I turned 21 this year!

I remember being about 10 years old and wishing that I could just sleep, wake up and be 21!

HOW TIME REALLY FLIES!!

Todays post will consist of me sharing 21 things that I have personally learnt in this journey of turning 21..

ENJOY! (P.S - this is in no particular order)

  1. Self-pity can be a big time waster.
  2. I ask a lot of questions.
  3. I like making other people happy.
  4. People will always fail you at some point in life - don't take it too personal as they are not God!
  5. Live at peace with yourself and others always.
  6. I like things done a certain way (my way is the best way lol) - God is still working on me in that area.
  7. Consistency is key.
  8. I am an over-thinker.
  9. I can be very defensive.
  10. Maturity does not come with age.
  11. Choose your friends - they either make or break you.
  12. Boldness is a life-essential.
  13. Self-assessments/checks are very important - check yourself before you wreck yourself.
  14. Say NO to being nosy - you will most definitely find things out that may end up leaving you hurt lol.
  15. Never get too busy for God.
  16. When God pushes you to pray, its because he is about to do something and when the devil makes you prayer-less, it is because he is also about to do something.
  17. Money is not everything.
  18. The way the world loves is different from the way God loves - divine/agape love is the best!
  19. The state of your heart is always exposed in your responses and reactions.
  20. Don't wait for anyone! - learn to do things alone!
  21. Every personality/character in a family compliments the family as a whole.
*big sigh*

I really had to think 'deep' for this post!

Please do feel free to ask me questions if you need further explanations on any of the above.

Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
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Hey Guys,

I recently took part in a challenge called 'HipsterMix' by the lovely blogger - SkinnyHipster.

You can read about the challenge HERE!

I put my outfit together but ofcourse I had to complete it with a black oversized jacket and also a black satchel bag (my absolute favourites - simply because you can rock them with just everything and anything)

That day was pretty fun! Ofcourse I had to cope with the British weather but all in all, I enjoyed the day.

I hope you enjoy scrolling through the pictures.

Details of my outfit:

White Long Sleeve Top - Primark
Jeans - Urban Outfitters
Heels - New Look
Black Satchel Bag - Charity Shop
Black Oversized Jacket - Charity Shop












Till next time.

Ejiji-Vintage
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About me

Welcome to my blog. My name is Princess (yes! that is my real name). My blog is a combination of my mind, thoughts, and the things I am passionate about.
My motto is 'transparency' and 'just being yourself' and so, please be encouraged to do just that as you read through my posts.
I hope you learn a thing or two from my posts.
Lots of love.
Princess

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